6 Years of Strange Resolutions

In recent years, I’ve kept a list of all my New Year’s Resolutions.  This is 100% bonafide true.

Here’s the recap:

“Atlanta!  YES! I’ll go to Atlanta!”

2008Say “Yes” not “Yeah.”  I realized that having a southern accent doesn’t mean I have to be sloppy with my speech.  Because I heard my children saying “yeah” all the time when they were supposed to be saying “Yes Ma’am – Yes Sir ” made me crazy.  So I decided to start with myself.  It was honestly a tedious effort at first to put my teeth together and hiss the “essss” out.  Much harder than the “eeuuhhhh” of “Yeeeaaauuuhhhh.”

But Scarlett never said, “Yeah, I reckon I’ll go to Atlanta.”
2009Stop groaning when I get up off the floor.  Whenever I would sit on the floor to play a game with one of my children, I would start to stand, when all of the sudden, this strange groaning sound would come out of my mouth. When I would lean over to pick something up off the floor – there it was again.  I’m not old. I don’t hurt. But it was just habit to sound like a Granny.  It took almost the full year to break that habit, but I immediately felt better.
2010Drink more, exercise less. This was a good year. There comes a point when you have to just enjoy life and stop being so dang obsessive about health.  Which leads me to . . .

2011Eat More Fried Chicken.  I could write an entire book on what happened this year.  I really love fried chicken, but because of a hereditary history of high cholesterol and a general fear of the bathroom scales, I NEVER ate it.  Family reunions, church dinner on the grounds, tailgating, you name it – fried chicken was everywhere.  I mean, this is SOUTH ALABAMA for crying out loud!  Fried chicken is practically dripping from the trees!

Finally, one day, I snapped. I couldn’t take it anymore. I found myself in the KFC parking lot sobbing. So I decided for one year, I would indulge.  I would eat fried chicken whenever and wherever there was the opportunity.
And it was glorious.
It was one of the best years of my life.  I’ve never felt more alive.  The sky was bluer and the air was sweeter. I ended up gaining a few pounds that wouldn’t come off, but I don’t think that had anything to do with the chicken.  I think it was related to 2010’s drinking / exercise resolution instead.
Let’s just move on . . .


2012Use it up, donate it, or toss it out! I finally got rid of many odds and ends that had been sitting around for a long, long time. Wilted Easter cupcake paper liners from 1999,  “When Harry Met Sally” VHS,  Bob The Builder Happy Meal toys. Each item saved for a special occasion was finally used, donated or discarded.But then, no lie,  – I was going through a box of craft items and came across a tiny bag of beads I had kept since college – COLLEGE . . . and in keeping with my resolution to get rid of things, decided to close my eyes and toss them out.

You know it – THE NEXT DAY I needed them!  AAGGHHHHH!!!

I’m never throwing anything out again.
And now for 2013.   This year, my resolution will be to entertain at least once a month.  Not just my regular friends, but new people I’ve never had over before.  Older people who are fascinating, new young couples who have just moved here.  People I’ve seen downtown for years and always loved talking with.
The point is to spend time with people I like. Fairhope is overflowing with interesting people from all types of backgrounds.  We say, “Let’s get together sometime” but suddenly, another year has  passed and we still don’t know each other any better.
Whether it’s a cup of coffee at Latte Da, or a full home cooked meal, I’m going to make a point to call a new person every month.  I won’t worry about a clean house or what to serve.

Perhaps a bowl of soup and grilled cheese sandwich may be all they get.

Either that, or fried chicken.

Leave a comment 8 Comments


  1. Anonymous says

    I admire anyone who resolves to throw out “saved” treasures, however I often find the same thing as you did….the very next day you find a use for them! I think I will copy your 20ll and 2013 and invite more people over and serve fried chicken. Happy New Year!!

    A. Pat

  2. Dixie says

    This is a great idea to have monthly celebrations, to invite someone who you owe a return invitation or a new, fascinating friend. About 20 years ago, I decided to eat ice cream and whatever else I wanted (all in moderation, OF COURSE), because life is short. Better to die of a happy heart attack that linger long over twiggy salads!

  3. says

    A little over a year ago I sold my house that I had lived in for almost 19 years. You can imagine I had many “treasures” that I didn’t want to get rid of but had to because there just wasn’t any storage room in my husband’s house for it all. There were many arguments as I went through my “stuff” about what to keep and what do get rid of. Now I’m glad I did and I don’t miss it too much. And I have to have a KFC fix two or three times a year. I love the biscuits and cole slaw too. And the mashed potatoes…

  4. says

    Oh my goodness! You are crackin’ me up! I am your newest follower. A Southern girl (woman?) living in Canada…You just made me a little less homesick! Look for my post at http://24cottonwoodlane.blogspot.ca/ in the next few days…I donated a bunch of stuff and wound up with a table. And a chair. And 3 mugs…

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